Here We Go… Again

Hello Friends!

It’s been a long time since I’ve written here, or anywhere for that matter.

I honestly thought I was done with this blog because I put so much pressure on myself to be this person online that had it all together; a teacher, of sorts, and finding out (again) that I’m not kinda crushed me. This is a cycle I’ve been through before, and still hadn’t learned my lesson.

Though I am extremely passionate about mental health and sharing what I’ve learned in therapy with just about anyone that will listen, I am no expert. I am just a human being, learning and trying to grow as I go through life’s highs and lows. I am just Paige. I just exist and write things, and maybe somebody will relate to that, who knows?

I thought about running away and starting a new blog like a coward, to recreate myself somewhere else, but I finally decided to just come back here and face the few followers that might still be left. If you’re reading this, thank you.

I make no promises right now about when or how often I’ll post, but I’m going to aim for at least once a week. I’d like to get back into sharing my life and thoughts again, because I miss that.

The type of content on this blog may change, I’m really not sure what I’m doing right now, but I am determined to figure it out.

Quick “life updates”:

• My cat, Benji, passed away in December of 2020 and it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to deal with. I still miss that boy every single day and I hate that he’s gone, but I’m learning to live without him, and love my other cat more in his absence. Rest in peace, my sweet boy.
• I have been too depressed to write much in the past six to eight months. I’m going to be trying to get back into it though, because I miss my creative outlet terribly and I have so many ideas that I just haven’t gotten around to yet!
• As I’m sure most of you can relate, covid has been an incredibly hard thing to cope and deal with.
• I graduated my DBT class in April!! Six months of therapy felt like a LIFETIME, but I’m so grateful for all of the things I’ve learned, and am still learning every day. I can honestly say that DBT changed my life for the better, even though it was (and is) incredibly hard sometimes.
• Got a job and lost it less than six months later due to Covid (basically), so that was a huge, huge stressor on me. Currently searching for something new, which is terrifying, but also exciting.
• My best friend in the entire world had a baby and she fills my heart with so much joy! 😀
• Again, as I’m sure a lot of you can relate during this pandemic, I played a whole lot of Animal Crossing and fell in love with my island and villagers. I’ve never played an Animal Crossing game before, but New Horizons really brought me a lot of comfort, and gave me something to do when life felt too overwhelming.

I don’t know, a lot has happened — some good, some bad, some wonderful, and some completely terrible — and there’s still so many things I want to share, but most of those things will probably end up in posts of their own because there’s just too much to cover in this one post.

I’m working on writing a bunch of posts today so they’re ready to post when I want, but again, I’m not sure of a schedule at the moment, but I’m going to try my best. I apologize if I’m a little rusty, it’s been a long time.

Again, if you’re reading this right now, thank you. I hope you’ll stick around.

Stay safe and try to take care of yourselves during these difficult times!

Paige

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2020 – Back Again?

Hello Friends! I’m back. Again. Hoping that maybe I can actually stick to this habit this time.

I used to enjoy blogging, but I got stuck in my head a lot, and to be honest, I still am, but this is me, trying to push past those mental blocks and get back into the swing of things.

So much has changed since I was here last, and I intend to talk about as much of it as I can remember over the next few weeks, but as a quick summary to whet your whistles:

• I live with my fiancee now, as well as our two cats, and a crested gecko! It’s a crazy, wonderful life. That’ll be a whole post in itself, I think, but not because I live somewhere else. You’ll have to read the post, I guess 😛
• I don’t really write poetry/prose anymore, but I want to get back into it. We’ll see how that goes. If it goes well I might post that on here, but again . . . we’ll see.
• My mental health has been a rollercoaster and a half, as usual, but now I have a diagnosis. After being misdiagnosed for a while and on the completely wrong medication. I am currently unmedicated again which is a mess, but hopefully not for much longer. I have a phone appointment with my therapist on this upcoming Thursday and should know more then.
• I think I’ve gotten two new tattoos since I made my initial tattoo post, and am hoping to get another one sorta soon. I’ll update for sure with pictures of my newer ones, and if I end up getting a new one soon I’d like to post about that a bit more, as well. My tattoos are important to me, for lots of reasons I will probably go into in the tattoo update posts.
• I didn’t think it was possible for me to get more anxious about writing than I was before, but somehow I have, and it’s caused a huge mental block, which is no fun. But I’m taking baby steps to get back into the swing of things and I love it.
• Unfortunately no longer working, which is sometimes a blessing and sometimes a curse.
• I turned 23! Oof. Feels like I was 16 just yesterday! Where does the time go?
• Of course there’s SO much happening in the world right now. Not entirely sure how political I want to get on this blog, despite viewing myself as a fairly socially and politically minded person, I don’t want this to turn into a super negative space.

I think those are the major things for now.

So, I know I’ve said this before and failed, but expect a bunch of posts over the next few weeks (no more than two a week, though!)

Let me know in the comments if you have any feedback or questions!

As always, but especially in times like these, stay safe and take care of yourself and your loved ones, friends!

Paige

An Update

Well, my friends, needless to say sometimes life does not go the way we plan it. 

The past week and a half-ish has been rough. First of all, I’ve been struggling with my mental health something fierce (but I’ll touch more on that in another post, I think!), and everything that could go wrong seemingly has. 

My computer fizzed out on me, and I’m the idiot that never backs up her work*, so I lost EVERYTHING for my NaNoWriMo project this year, as well as the half-finished draft of Awake.

*Or at least I used to be. I certainly won’t be anymore! 

I’m honestly heartbroken, but I’m trying my best to get back on track — though I certainly won’t be finishing NaNoWriMo with 50k this year now, and I probably won’t have the rough draft of Awake done by February, I know I did my best. 

And it taught me a valuable lesson: BACK UP YOUR WORK EVERY TIME YOU QUIT! To several places. Just saving it to your computer isn’t enough. 

And maybe it’s for the best. Maybe I’ll write a better story now that the old draft is gone. Or at least that’s what I have to tell myself to keep from getting too discouraged.

Anyway, that’s all for now. Thanks for reading!

Love you guys, 

Paige

Lots going on!

Hey everybody, it’s been a while since I made a post here, and I’m sorry for that, but! I have some exciting stuff going on that I hope makes up for it.

 

1. I started a Patreon! So if you want to support me on a more consistent basis, head on over there for the rough drafts I’m working on + Alive in all its glory.
2. No worries if you can’t/don’t want to, though, because all of my rough draft work will be posted on my new Wattpad account approximately a week after my Friends on Patreon have it.
3. Awake is in full swing over on Wattpad already, and I can’t wait to share it with you guys.
4. I’m PLANNING on doing NaNoWriMo this year, so you can find me over there if you want to. I’d love to be friends, if you’re participating! Now, whether or not I’ll SUCCEED in NaNoWriMo is a whole different story, but I’m going to try!

I think that’s all the major stuff. I’m going to go work on Awake for now, and I’ll talk to you guys again soon, I promise.

Long Time Coming

Hello hello, friends!

It’s been far too long since I made a post, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to make this one either, because that means Coming Back, and I’m not very good at keeping up with this blog anymore, but y’know what? I’m gonna try my best.

And my best may not be very good, but it will be my best.

 

Today I have exciting news! I finally published Alive: A Journey To Redemption!

After five freaking years of writing and rewriting, it’s finally done and ready for public consumption!

It feels a little surreal, to be honest. I feel like I should still be fussing over describing Riley in the diner, and nitpicking at words in the end scenes, but I’m not.

Instead I’m working on Awake: A Work In Progress, and it feels good.

 

I don’t really have much else to say in this post, but I promise I’ll try to be here more over the next little while.

Thank you for your patience.

 

 

 

 

Camp NaNoWriMo Update #1

Hello, friends!

I almost decided not to write a post today because I was ashamed of myself.

My word count on my NaNo novel so far is a whopping 835 right now, which is 832 words less than I was supposed to have on the first day.

Whoops. But I was reading articles about rambling roses, trying to get back to the roots of this blog (ba dum tshh!) when I discovered this little gem:

“To prepare the ground adequately for a climbing rose is a prime requisite for success. The soil ought to be naturally rich, or be made so. Though climbing roses will grow on poor soil more successfully than other kinds of roses, the fact remains that the better we treat them the better they will treat us.” Planting and Taking Care of Climbing Roses on OldandSold.com

(Yes I know the article/quote is about climbing roses, and my blog refers to ‘rambling roses’, but both plants are similar in structure and nature so I’ll allow it!)

And I realized that just because I’m off to a bad start doesn’t mean it’s time to dig the seed out of the ground and throw it in the trash, it means it’s time to dig my roots in and get growing some ding-dang-diddly ramblin’ roses!

So maybe my soil started out poor due to my lack of effort, but I’m recommitting to myself, to my novel, and to you right here, that I will treat my soil novel better, so that it (and I) can become a beautiful rose someday.

Sorry this update was short and probably didn’t make much sense, but I’ve got some writing to do! I will talk to you all next Wednesday, if not sooner! 🙂

 

 

 

Update time!

Hello, hello friends!

I figured it was about time I used my blog for something other than badly written poems and drippy, melodramatic prose pieces.

First of all, I’ve decided to post on a schedule now (or try, anyway!) Actually, I’ve been trying for a few weeks now but for whatever reason WordPress doesn’t like me when I try to schedule things and it just posts whenever it feels like it, so I’m trying to figure out a way around that. Anyway, I’m *hoping* to post every Wednesday around 2-3pm (EST), but if I have to post manually the times might be off due to my unpredictable work schedule.

Second, you can expect to see a lot of me in July.

I have a lot planned with writing updates, and some drippy, melodramatic prose ( 😛 ), and I’ve got a few other ideas, too, so hold tight.

I’ll be the first person to admit that I’m not the best at sticking to deadlines, and yes, I know people are still waiting on Alive (not to mention Awake) but I’m going to try hard, friends.

Also, Camp NaNoWriMo is coming up in just a few days so I’m preparing myself for that. I have honestly never been so excited, or nervous to participate before because I’ve never attempted NaNoWriMo with a full time job, but we’re gonna try this time.

Anyway, that’s it for this update. I’ll see you all in July! 🙂